This buddy got a surprise last night as they found the mother load of seeds on the feeder table…
I’ll include that clip from our wyze cams in the next Vloguary post on YouTube…
I can identify with this little bandit…
Hunting for sustenance
Lurking in the shadows
Consuming everything and anything in sight…
My brain has been like this…
With creating our new room set ups…
New office where the studio was
New guest bedroom where the den/snug/tv room was
New studio where the old upstairs tv room was…
I make lists and lists
Some are my chores
Some are household chores
Some are items to move…
Little yellow chest to new guest room
All cardboard to basement
Don’t forget to wash the downstairs shower curtain
And don’t forget to water the plants~ you last did it on this day
Oof the plants are a true reflection of how my brain feels…
Languishing
Needs nurturing
Needs nourishment
Needs time to get back to full strength…
And I don’t argue with the muses…
When they put inspiration in front of me…
I feel like I can not turn down that gift.
The timing is odd…
Being my winter wall/low vitamin D time…
I found I heap of information
A wealth of knowledge
Plethora of resources…
A rabbit hole if you will…
About inner child healing
Childhood trauma
Shadow work
Behavioral type therapy goodness…
And as I consume the theory
And find the patterns that match mine…
I feel a click…
And it’s invigorating as it is deeply saddening…
I feel comfort in the knowledge that there are tools here…
And I’m not the only one…
At the same time~ I have a very upset child inside of me…
She’s pissed…
She’s broken every window in her room…
And the screams of rage…
They are sometimes all I hear……………
I know now that if I silence the white noise
That is the cause and effect of this bee sting of emotional chaos
I might finally take the edge off
I don’t think I will ever be able to erase it
Unless that machine that removes unwanted memory
From eternal sunshine for the spotless mind movie…
But I pause
And look at that raccoon
What does it represent
Maybe that they can consume trash
And be nourished by it…
Unharmed…
And move along…?
And they look cute with a smoky eye…
Maybe…
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